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Gujju

Complaints Of Gujaratis In Britain

These are extracts from actual letters sent to Leicester Council and other housing associations written by Britain's Gujaratis: 1. I want some repairs done to my wife's cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off. 2. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in my back passage. 3. And their 18-year-old son is continually banging his balls... » READ MORE
Posted by on July 15, 2011

Kanbjibhai and Rupaben

Kanjibhai is talking to the family doctor. "Doc, I think my wife Rupaben going deaf." The doctor answers, "Well, here's something you can try on her to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again. Keep repeating this until she answers. Then you'll be able to tell just how hard of hearing she really... » READ MORE
Posted by on April 11, 2011

Marwari goes to restaurant with Gujju

A Marwari guy and a Gujarati guy went out to a very expensive restaurant for dinner one night. Finally, the waiter came over and asked, "Who should I give the check to?" The Marwari guy said, "Give it to me. I'll take care of everything." "Fine," said the waiter. The next day the headlines read: 'Gujrarati Ventriloquist Strangled to Death' ... » READ MORE
Posted by on April 11, 2011

Gujju Rajnikant Jokes

1 Var CID Officer Daya Darwajo Todava Gayo, Pan Jindgi Ma Peli Var Tenathi Darwajo Na Tutyo, Thodi Var Pachhi Andar Thi Awaj Aavyo... . . Aa RAJNIKANT Nu Ghar Chhe. ======================================== Breaking News: Aaje Ek Train Cycle Sathe Japet Ma Aavi Gai Train Ma Bethel Badha Loko Mari Gaya.. Cycle Driver "RAJNIKANT" Farrar..! ======================================== Rajnikant Savare... » READ MORE
Posted by on March 27, 2011

You’re a Gujju If….

- You have at least 1 relative in the stock market. - You're never worried about what happens if you get stranded in Mumbai. All you'd have to do, you know, is walk across the road and find a relative. (Still easier, just shout, "Mama! Masi! Faiba! Kaka!" a couple of times. At least one is bound to be around.) - You don't worry about being stranded in New Jersey. You've been told by everyone that... » READ MORE
Posted by on March 27, 2011

Assorted Gujju Jokes

Q: What do you call a gujju with no knees? A: Knee-less ( Nilesh ) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mara maran par tame aansoo naa bahavsho, Mara maran par dosto gam na karsho.. ..Maari yad aave to sidha upar aavjo!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jivan maa JAS nathi, Prem maa RAS nathi; Dhandha maa KAS nathi, Javu chhe swarg maa, pan eni koi BUS nathi. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tu hase chhe jyaare... » READ MORE
Posted by on March 27, 2011
Faaltu Fatta

Laloo becomes a model

After having resigned as the CM of Bihar, Laloo decides to go modelling.
Once he enters the herd of buffaloes and resting his elbow on the back of the
cattle he poses for a photograph. Next day the photo appears on the front page
of a newspaper.
GUESS THE CAPTION !!
"Laloo, third from left!"

More jokes
Latest: MainStory
Rajnikant Saves The World (During A Smoke Break)
While the world and India is lurching from crisis to crisis, only one person can prevent disaster. It’s a bird, it’s a plane, no, it’s Rajnikant! 1. Rajnikant just downgraded Standard & Poor’s credit rating. Moody’s and Fitch have been warned. 2. Rajnikant just brought the Jan LokPal... » READ MORE
Latest: JaaliBlog
Pakistan's Tourist Trap
Some stories you just can't make up. Like this one from the Washington Post. We bet the writer of the headline spent hours in wonder before delivering this bit of brilliance: Pakistan struggles to attract tourists amid violence. Ah, we see. Is that what it is? Some of the content of the article is... » READ MORE
Latest: CalumnyColumn
The A To Z Of India In 2011: The Bad And The Verse
Earlier this year, we had presented The A To Z Of India In 2011. Hey, lots of stuff (and nonsense) happened since then. Things got worse. So, we’re back, with another go at recapping the year that was, which can variously be described as India’s Annus Horribilis or Annas Horribilis. A... » READ MORE
Latest: SmearScape
The Anna Annals: The Compleat Glossary
These are some of the neologisms that Anna Hazare has spawned - in my mind. Blame it on the hysterically fawning electronic media; the faux but sincere Gandhian, poor man, had little to do with them. Please feel free to exercise your inalienable right to add as many more to the broth as... » READ MORE
Latest: FairGame
XI Odes To The Indian XI
India’s not playing too well, Defeat has a sour smell, Tired bowlers can take no wickets, Flashy bats keep punching their tickets, Blame it all on the IPL. Among the ruins, standing tall, Is the man we call The Wall, Dravid, recalled to the one-days, For the BCCI may as well say, “The others... » READ MORE
Latest: LaughingStock
Pawarful Slapstick
Once upon a time, you really hadn't arrived in Indian politics unless you'd had footwear hurled at you. But things change fast in politics and the flavour of the day is the slap. And, as ever, the Chinese are watching (or reading your emails). And sensing an opportunity, they want to jump in to the... » READ MORE