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Gujju
Complaints Of Gujaratis In Britain
These are extracts from actual letters sent to Leicester Council and other housing associations written by Britain's Gujaratis:
1. I want some repairs done to my wife's cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
2. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in my back passage.
3. And their 18-year-old son is continually banging his balls... » READ MORE
Posted by on July 15, 2011
Kanbjibhai and Rupaben
Kanjibhai is talking to the family doctor. "Doc, I think my wife Rupaben going deaf."
The doctor answers, "Well, here's something you can try on her to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again. Keep repeating this until she answers. Then you'll be able to tell just how hard of hearing she really... » READ MORE
Posted by on April 11, 2011
Marwari goes to restaurant with Gujju
A Marwari guy and a Gujarati guy went out to a very expensive restaurant for dinner one night.
Finally, the waiter came over and asked, "Who should I give the check to?"
The Marwari guy said, "Give it to me. I'll take care of everything."
"Fine," said the waiter.
The next day the headlines read: 'Gujrarati Ventriloquist Strangled to Death'
... » READ MORE
Posted by on April 11, 2011
Gujju Rajnikant Jokes
1 Var CID Officer Daya Darwajo Todava Gayo,
Pan Jindgi Ma Peli Var Tenathi Darwajo Na Tutyo,
Thodi Var Pachhi Andar Thi Awaj Aavyo...
.
.
Aa RAJNIKANT Nu Ghar Chhe.
========================================
Breaking News:
Aaje Ek Train Cycle Sathe Japet Ma Aavi Gai
Train Ma Bethel Badha Loko Mari Gaya..
Cycle Driver "RAJNIKANT" Farrar..!
========================================
Rajnikant Savare... » READ MORE
Posted by on March 27, 2011
You’re a Gujju If….
- You have at least 1 relative in the stock market.
- You're never worried about what happens if you get stranded in Mumbai. All you'd have to do, you know, is walk across the road and find a relative. (Still easier, just shout, "Mama! Masi! Faiba! Kaka!" a couple of times. At least one is bound to be around.)
- You don't worry about being stranded in New Jersey. You've been told by everyone that... » READ MORE
Posted by on March 27, 2011
Assorted Gujju Jokes
Q: What do you call a gujju with no knees?
A: Knee-less ( Nilesh )
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mara maran par tame aansoo naa bahavsho,
Mara maran par dosto gam na karsho..
..Maari yad aave to sidha upar aavjo!!
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Jivan maa JAS nathi,
Prem maa RAS nathi;
Dhandha maa KAS nathi,
Javu chhe swarg maa,
pan eni koi BUS nathi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tu hase chhe jyaare... » READ MORE
Posted by on March 27, 2011
Laloo becomes a model
After having resigned as the CM of Bihar, Laloo decides to go modelling.
Once he enters the herd of buffaloes and resting his elbow on the back of the
cattle he poses for a photograph. Next day the photo appears on the front page
of a newspaper.
GUESS THE CAPTION !!
"Laloo, third from left!"
The more things change, the more they stay the same: Reupping our piece from back when Bangaru Laxman was still BJP President:
Given the porosity of the Indian defence procurement establishment, we at Jaal, always looking for an easy buck but hardly ever making one, decided to undertake... » READ MORE
Back in history, circa 2011, you would’ve been hard-pressed to find a native Bong who didn’t want to get rid of the Communist junta in the State. That is, apart from the apparatchiks. Trinamul Congress leader Mamata Banerjee was the saviour.
Well, about a year later, in the State of Poschim... » READ MORE
Earlier this year, we had presented The A To Z Of India In 2011. Hey, lots of stuff (and nonsense) happened since then. Things got worse. So, we’re back, with another go at recapping the year that was, which can variously be described as India’s Annus Horribilis or Annas Horribilis.
A... » READ MORE
Oh, Prime Ministerial Lord, make me a sports authority of your games;
where there is common, let me steal wealth;
where there is contract, commission;
where there is agreement, kickbacks;
where there is deal, cut;
where there is pact, brokerage;
where there is bill, fee.
Oh, Apolitical... » READ MORE
India’s not playing too well,
Defeat has a sour smell,
Tired bowlers can take no wickets,
Flashy bats keep punching their tickets,
Blame it all on the IPL.
Among the ruins, standing tall,
Is the man we call The Wall,
Dravid, recalled to the one-days,
For the BCCI may as well say,
“The others... » READ MORE
Once upon a time, you really hadn't arrived in Indian politics unless you'd had footwear hurled at you. But things change fast in politics and the flavour of the day is the slap.
And, as ever, the Chinese are watching (or reading your emails). And sensing an opportunity, they want to jump in to the... » READ MORE
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