You buy clothes from K-mart and put it in a recycled gift box from Macy's before giving it.
Your favorite brandname is "IRREGULAR".
The few silverware you have is mismatched and plastic.
You frequently get honked at by those stupid American drivers who think they know how to drive.
You know someone who owns a motel or a convenience store.
It's embarrassing if your wedding has less than 600 people.