You think an Indian businessman will give you a better deal because he's Indian.
You spew forth the virtues of India, but don't want to live there.
Your list your daughter as "fair and slim" in the matrimonials no matter what she looks like.
Your dad thinks it's perfectly OK to hawk and spit out a loogey on the sidewalk.
You use Vicks Vaporub.
The video tapes you rent are 10th generation copies and have scrolling commercials in the middle of the movie.