Actual label instructions on Pakistani consumer products:
1. On a helmet mounted mirror used by Pakistani cyclists - REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.
2. On a Pakistani shampoo - USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.
3. On the bottle-top of a flavoured milk drink - AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.
4. On a Pakistani insect spray - THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
5. In Pakistan, on the bottom of Coke bottles - OPEN OTHER END.
6. On a bag of Fritos - YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.
7. On a bar of soap - DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.
8. On Pakistani Ice-cream (printed on bottom of the box)- DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
9. On a Pakistani kitchen knife - WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
10. On packet of peanuts - WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.
11. On an Pakistani Airlines packet of nuts - INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.
12. On Pakistani Sleeping pills - WARNING MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.
13. PAKISTANI CARS - MOVING OBJECT KEEP AWAY FROM IT.
14. PAKISTANI CONDOMS - FOR SINGLE USE ONLY.
15. PAKISTANI TAMPONS - FOR FEMALE USE ONLY.
16. PAKISTANI SUGAR - NOT THE REGULAR BROWN SUGAR, THIS IS JUST A SWEETENER.
17. PAKISTANI CIGARETTES - PLEASE LIGHT IT, FOR BETTER RESULTS.
18. PAKISTANI WHISKEY - SAVE PETROL.
19. PAKISTANI CAR LUBRICANTS - THIS IS FOR AUTOMOBILES ONLY, PLEASE CONSULT YOUR DOCTOR FOR APPLICATION ON PRIVATE PARTS.
20. PAKISTANI TOOTH PASTE - GOOD FOR GERMS HARMFUL FOR TEETH.
21. PAKISTANI FRIDGES - COOLS FASTER THAN HEATERS.
22. PAKISTANI HAIR OIL - GOOD FOR THE SOIL.
23. PAKISTANI NEWSPAPERS - CONTAINS ADULT INFORMATION,THE NEWSPAPERS ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE IF THE WRITTEN MATTER IS OBJECTIONABLE.
24. PAKISTANI RIFLES - FIRE FOR FUN,HIT & RUN.
25. PAKISTANI NOTEBOOKS - PLEASE DO NOT TRY TO READ IT, IT'S BLANK......
26. PAKISTANI PEPPERMINT - PLEASE DO NOT LOAD IT ON YOUR REVOLVER.