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Now that five Indian cricket personalities have been handed down their sentences in damning paragraphs, by the BCCI, they'll have to opt for alternate employment. However, finding suitable jobs for the boys is not a simple task. So we put our heads together and found means by which they could stay gainfully employed. Since they've spent most of their careers before cameras, it's also obvious that their future lies there as well. Here are our suggestions:
I. Mohammed Azharuddin: From Ajju to Azza, it's been a long, strange journey. Now that he has been banned for life, it's unlikely that he'll ever make a comeback though even at 50 he would probably be fitter than the 20-something geriatrics who currently play for the country. But, now to the crux.
Were those wristy flicks the result of greased palms? Well, the BCCI and the CBI believe so, so Azhar's out for the count. But he has got to find some way to keep those wrists Cartier-clad. And, working as a PR Manager for the State Bank of India will not help. Especially since he himself opted to stash his money away elsewhere. Our suggestion? Another game show with a twist. It will be telecast during one-day internationals and the contestants will bet virtual bucks on predicting what happens next while being given four choices. For instance, whether a batsman will block the next ball, hoick it for a six, take a single or get out. If the choice is closest to what actually occurs, the contestant wins real money. Now as for questions as to how articulate the Great Mumbler can be as a host, believe us, if Manisha Koirala can do it, he can. Sangeeta can be the co-host.
Ajay Jadeja: The Ebullient One could serve as pin-up boy for the cellphone service providers but there may be greater things in life. For instance, a career in Bollywood since he's already signed up for a film or two. The ideal role to display his off-field histrionic talent would be as the Angry Young Man set upon by the Establishment and unfairly punished for a crime he claims not to have committed. Have some khoon-pasina dialogue thrown in and a gaggle of gals dancing around stumps as Jaddu bowls them over and you've got a winner. Various films on the same theme may be shot after all Jadeja will have five years to keep himself occupied.
3. Manoj Prabhakar: Mannubhai has already made preparations for the future that awaits him. After months of lugging around hidden cameras catching his erstwhile colleagues out, this self-proclaimed messiah of Indian cricket, the cleaner of the Augean stables, can now switch full-time to a career that will be more rewarding than marketing herbal cosmetics, floating a chit fund or playing a politics, since each of those ventures stinks. So Manoj should be lapped up by any of the channels for a prime-time reality-based show in which he lurks up upon unsuspecting folk and secretly records their reaction to the story he concocts. Cyrus is already doing it, but there's no reason Prabhakar can't broach the subject. After all, uska camera mere camera se zyada candid kyon?
If this opportunity goes abegging, he could always host a Rajni-type serial aimed at exposing the ills of society with each episode devoted to how Kapil Dev is singly responsible for corruption, inefficiency, electricity outages, arsenous water, inflation, overcharging, garbage, pollution, everything.
Ajay Sharma: He could play an important behind-the-scenes role when it comes to cricket coverage - liaising with players, preparing weather, pitch and ground condition reports, and predicting the course of the game before it's begun.
Ali Irani: The ex-physiotherapist can be the ideal assistant to Azhar on his game show acting as the go-between in monetary transactions.
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