|
|
|
|
What's Behind The Bush? More Gore |
||
|
 |
Prime Minister: Haan bhai. Kya hua Amrika mein? Kuch decide kiya unhone? External Affairs Minister: George has won. PM: I thought he was in Kargil, addressing the jawans. Defence Minister: No Sir, I'm right here. PM: What are you doing here? DM: What to say, Sir. Another war front has hotted up. Home Minister: He means the split in the other Bihar party, between Ram Vilas Paswan and Sharad Yadav. DM: No Sir, there's another front. PM: Which is…? DM: My would-be wife's pressurising me to exonerate her would-be son-in-law in the match-fixing controversy. HM: That would be a crisis. (A moment of silence as the Cabinet meditates on this) PM: Let's move on to something less intractable, like Kashmir. EAM: I beg pardon to interrupt, Sir, but we're here to discuss George. PM: I thought that's what we were doing. EAM: The other George, Sir, with humble respect. PM: Well. (Pauses) I've got nothing to say. What about you guys? HM: Well, is the result final? I have been reading the newspapers, and they say that Gore will contest the election results in court. PM: This is dangerous. What if politicians in India start contesting poll figures? HM: Arre, nothing to worry about. The Supreme Court is there. PM: Already Narmada cost us so much. HM: A small price to pay for upholding democracy. PM: True, true.   EAM: It appears that we will be dealing with a Republican administration.PM: So what does that mean? EAM: It means no more Madeline Albright! (Breaks into loud sobs). PM: There, there. EAM: Where, where? DM: Well, at least you get to deal with Colin Powell. (EAM starts to wail) PM: Okay, okay, let's move on. DM: Frankly, I'm totally against dynastic rule. PM: Why bring Sonia Gandhi into this? DM: I'm talking of Bush! PM: Why bring bush into this? HM: Come on, there's nothing in common with Sonia and George W. He's won the election due to his own efforts. He has repeatedly said he's his own man. Well, they're still different. George W is said to be pretty dumb. PM: And what, Sonia is not dumb? She hasn't been able to come up with an issue against our Government yet. Despite all the opportunities you buffoons have been giving her. HM: Well, Sonia can't take decisions without a coterie. EAM: I may humbly submit here, Sir, that George W Bush has campaigned saying that he will compensate his administrative inexperience by picking a strong team for his White House. In fact, his Vice-President, an Arjun Singh lookalike, appears to be selecting the people for the team. HM: Enough already! You're forgetting that George W Bush is a White with a superiority complex. DM: And Sonia Gandhi is a…? (All-round silence) PM: I think you're all making much ado about nothing. George W Bush will be good for India. EAM: How's that, Sir? PM: If he's as dumb as they say, he'll ignore India completely during his tenure. EAM: How's that good, Sir? PM: We get to keep the bomb, crap on the Kashmiris, and screw the Pakistanis for another four years. Send my regards to the new President. The next Lok Sabha is in the bag! (Meeting ends). RECENTLY ON JAAL: The Florida Ceasefire The Damn Dam Controversy A Weak-Kneed Operation Faster, Higher, Stranger You Have The Right To Be A Volunteer The ICE ICE Baby A Tale Of The Jungle King The Secret Autonomy Report Report When Batsman Became Betsman India's Human Genome Projectile Stone Age Flaws In ICE Age Laws A Dry Spell For Policy Planning Lara's Theme Dotcom Bubble Gum: Burst Or Bust Inside A VIP Cell A To Do About Dos A Dress Code For Klintonji Aditya Sinha is a writer and disciple of the the Great Gnuman SEND US YOUR FEEDBACK ABOUT THIS ARTICLE:
|
| | About Us | Archives | Help | E-mail | Advertise | Legal Crap | Webmaster | | |
| Copyright © 1999 Jaal eZine™ | nEtAhOy ! |
