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Bill Clinton's Hidden Agenda Or Hail To The Chief |
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According to highly unreliable sources, Mr Clinton had been sounded out earlier on this proposal but had demurred due to his busy schedule of engagements. However, once he had forgiven Marc Rich, returned the White House silver and stuck his tongue out at Al Gore, Mr Clinton agreed to the proposal. Apparently, his arrival in India later in April will witness his anointment as the new chief of the BJP. This move has been on the BJP's agenda ever since former party chief Bangaru Laxman was forced to resign following the tehelka.com expose. Utterly embarrassed at the manner in which Mr Laxman had humiliated both himself and the party while on camera, the BJP was seeking someone with the ability and charisma to raise funds without raising eyebrows. Also, a source said, "He'll know how to deal with dollars better than that…." The present incumbent Mr Jana Krishnamurthy has been asked to quietly step aside to make way for Mr Clinton. Mr Krishnamurthy, it is learnt, has been promised a sinecure in return as the new Governor of the next state to be created. The sources also said that Mr Clinton's wife and New York Senator Hillary has been outspoken about her support for this sudden move. In private conversation, she is learnt to have said, "The further away that @#$*@#* goes, the happier I will be." Though this information has yet to be confirmed, it is also likely that Mr Clinton may be bringing along his own entourage. According to sources who were somewhat sozzled, the Indian Prime Minister, Mr Atal Behari Vajpayee, under pressure to remove key officials from the Prime Minister's Office, has also heeded Mr Clinton's advice and may induct hand-picked successors to Mr Brajesh Mishra and Mr N K Singh. The sources, before sliding under the table, said, "Buddy will be the new National Security Advisor and Socks the Officer on Special Duty." While initially, the BJP was somewhat worried about the possible reaction of the Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh to the move, apparently, the RSS has welcomed the appointment of Mr Clinton to the post. "We've seen him wearing khaki knickers (see picture), he's one of our own," an RSS peon said.  The BJP expects to counter the foreign hand by bringing in Mr Clinton thereby severely denting Congress President Sonia Gandhi's Caucasian vote bank.Mr Clinton, given his expertise and experience, will also provide a major fillip to Indo-US relations and is expected to take a keen interest in the foreign affairs cell of the party. The BJP is also making arrangements to accommodate the needs of Mr Clinton's staff. According to sources at its Ashoka Road headquarters, a number of interviews have already been arranged towards hiring interns for assisting Mr Clinton in his duties while an adequate supply of cigars has also been procured, the sources, while nursing their hangovers, said. RECENTLY ON JAAL: The Tapes: Replay The Naked Truth About Sinha's Dream Budget Give Us This Day Our Daily Disaster A Dip Into The Kumbh Hype Hype Hurray The A 2 Z Of Y2K What's Behind Bush? The Florida Ceasefire The Damn Dam Controversy A Weak-Kneed Operation Faster, Higher, Stranger You Have The Right To Be A Volunteer The ICE ICE Baby A Tale Of The Jungle King The Secret Autonomy Report Report When Batsman Became Betsman India's Human Genome Projectile Stone Age Flaws In ICE Age Laws A Dry Spell For Policy Planning Lara's Theme Dotcom Bubble Gum: Burst Or Bust Inside A VIP Cell A To Do About Dos A Dress Code For Klintonji Al Faridi Gnuman writes fiction and is also a journalist though the difference is difficult to perceive. SEND US YOUR FEEDBACK ABOUT THIS ARTICLE:
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