Remember Shane Warne? The fat, peroxide-blond Aussie leg spinner who once upon a time used to use his fingers to send down assorted googlies, 'zooters', wrong 'uns and various other mystery deliveries that foxed the best batsmen in the world-with the exception of Indians? (29 wickets in 11 Test matches against India).
These days the ex-vice captain and current vice-ridden bowler is sitting out a one-year ban for swallowing diet tablets his mummy gave him. There are still six months to go for that ban to be lifted. And meanwhile those fingers that spun a web of deceit around the world of cricket have been busy sending obscene text-messages on his mobile phone to various women around the world.
The latest 'victim' is a 45-year-old woman from South Africa who has been trawling her net around the cricket world in a bid to get the highest rate for her sordid story.
This is a guy who never seems to learn from his earlier mistakes. Three years ago he left lewd messages on the answering machine of a British nurse and that cost him the vice-captaincy of the National side. His autobiography is full of whining justifications. This is a man who feels he has NEVER done wrong in his life. But at least he keeps up with modern technology-from answering machines to text messages and no doubt some lewd e-mails (or more likely, Instant Messages) along the way too.
This is also the man who in 1998 was exposed as having been fined four years earlier for selling info on pitches, team selections and weather conditions to a bookie, something that had been hushed up by the Australian Cricket Board. Of course, it was all in innocent fun! It did though briefly make him the richest weatherman in the world.
Now Mr and Mrs Warne-the poor long suffering wife must rank close to Hillary Clinton as idiot spouse of the decade-have been forced to "flee" their homeland for England. The reason? A stripper has been all over the Aussie media with her lurid tails of a recent affair (or "sex romp" as the tabloids prefer) with 'Shame' Warne. The list appears endless! Where would the tabloids be without such a juicy source of endless "stories"?
Of course sportspersons are not saints and never have been. Interestingly, a former rugby player in Australia is being tried for punching a woman in a bar. No one has taken much notice of this. But then apparently Down Under they expect such loutishness from their 'footie' boys while a cricketer is still expected to be a real gent.
Of course sportspersons are not saints and never have been. But poor, old Warne (yes, one ALMOST feels sorry for him) has obviously never learned one golden lesson. If you are going to get up to mischief, make sure you never get caught! (Just ask Kobe Bryant).


Gulu Ezekiel is the author of biographies of Sachin Tendulkar and Saurav Ganguly

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