The truth is OUT. Narendra Modi has sneaked into the United States.
After having been denied a visa by the United States Government, Gujarat Chief Minister Narendra Modi apparently procured a fake travel document in the name of Teesta Setalvad and arrived at the Newark airport recently to a rousing welcome, during which he was thrice strip searched and given an anal probe by immigration officials. After finding that he wasn’t carrying anything dangerous other than a severe case of flatulence the officials bid “Ms Setalvad” a happy visit to the United States.
Modi was thereafter taken to Edison, New Jersey, where he was witnessed a parade taken out by Gujaratis protesting against the shortage of chivda at the local grocery stores. On arriving at the local office of the Overseas Friends of the BJP, Modi was welcomed by the guard who informed him that all the BJP members in the town out supporting a protest rally against the shortage of chivda in Edison.
Modi was suitably miffed because he had earlier sent an urgent email message to all US members of the BJP telling them of his impending arrival, a major blow of Indian nationalism. However, the email with the somewhat misspelt subject, “I am Cumming”, was deleted by the members and never read.
However, news of Modi’s arrival finally trickled out when he took out a full-page advertisement in Gujarat Samachar, which was, however, somewhat overshadowed by another full-page advertisement offering speedy delivery of chivda to Edison if ordered online.
The news was picked up on by the phalanx of protesters who had started the campaign that resulted in having the State Department deny Modi a visa. Large throngs of protestors soon gathered and rallied in Edison. However, they had to face an angry mob of Gujaratis irate over the online fraud over timely delivery of chivda. During the course of a stampede started when some packages of chivda were spotted at a grocery store, many of the activists were seriously hurt. They thereafter lodged a protest with the Administration over the violation of their human rights and have been taken to Gitmo for further questioning. The remaining secular activists were taken to the hospital, given brain scans and released when nothing was found. Three special agents of Pakistan’s ISI who were assisting the activists were picked up by the crew of an Indian American film and given striking roles in their movie. They will soon be appearing on screen as the Gandhi’s three monkeys.
Modi continued his victorious march through New Jersey on a chariot made from a converted Pinto sold to him by a car salesman. Modi’s dramatic procession included three cows, and a group of lost Amish.
However, since Modi knew that the American authorities were now aware of his subterfuge gaining entry into the United States, he once again used forged document for his trip back to Ahmedabad. The name stamped on his passport was Osama bin Laden.